How to Honor our Precious Life and Precious Body

As almost all of the world’s population knows, September 11th, 2008 marked the 7th anniversary of the fall of the Twin Towers. After many years of living in California, I happened to be home visiting my family in New York City when 9/11 happened. The shock of losing so many souls only a few miles away from where I was standing that morning took my breath away.

Seven years later, it’s still a healing in progress for many of us. Indeed, the scar that the towers falling left is only starting to heal as the foundation of the new Freedom Tower is layed out.

In 2004, when the Tsunami hit South Asia, I was in flight from Thailand to Cambodia. Thailand was one of the hardest hit nations, losing an estimated 8,000 to death and leaving 4,000 missing. The economic impact is almost incalculable with so many families losing their main income provider and so many jobs lost from the tourism industry.

Of course, Thailand was only one affected area – almost 300,000 people perished in the Tsunami, making it the largest loss of life in modern history. The coincidence of being so near two of the most awful, unforeseen events in our lifetime does not escape me.

How do we heal from life-changing events like this? I am forced to ask this question over and over. The Tsunami, the Twin Towers, Hurricane Katrina, War – so many of us have been directly affected by the disasters of this millennium. But even for those of us who have not lost loved ones or been uprooted, we stand in solidarity. We are the living legacy of souls lost and lives changed.

What does this have to do with body image and weight loss?

Everything, actually.

There are so many different interpretations of what happens when we lose someone. Where do they go? We know only one thing for sure – they are not in their bodies. That part of them has ended. Today, you and I have a privilege – we are in our bodies, we can enjoy one more day of our precious life.

In a crisis, we know what is real and we know what is not. We release our daily distractions and obsessions based on vanity and self-criticism. We are forced to live authentically and think only about the moment we are in. Today, live as if this is the last day of your life. And do that again, tomorrow and the next day…on and on.

Today, what you DOES matters.

The big stuff. The small stuff. All of it.

Your day-to-day choices matter.

You are breathing right now and that is a great starting point. The root of the word “inspire” means breath. Today, choose to be inspired and do all you can to continue to draw breath.

• I want to ask you to think before you attack yourself or attack another person.


• Move your body because you can. You are alive and you can move.


• Inspire others by being grateful rather than critical. You are alive and that is enough reason to celebrate everyday.
  

Choose to EXPIRE from nothing but old age.

You are living this one precious, precious life – right now. If you need some answers on how to make those day-to-day healthy choices become a reality in your own life, reach out to me by phone or email. I have a life-changing 12-week course that will free you from the prison of poor body image and low self-esteem and teach you to live a different kind of life. A reverent, inspiring life that makes you want to stand up and cheer.

To your health,
Laura Fenamore, CPCC, Body Image Mastery Mentor
www.LauraFenamore.com

One Earth, One Planet, One Humanity

I often think about the prejudice I face as a gay woman and how fortunate I am to be able to choose when and how to share that very important part of my life. When I sense that it is not “safe” to be gay, I can choose to keep that information to myself. I often wonder how people of color, or other nationalities or religions (such as Muslim women right now), face prejudice and judgment every day and find the courage to deal with the pain of not being able to have that same choice. They wear their “minority” on their sleeves, so to speak. Quite simply, I get to hide and they do not.

Call me Pollyanna, or simply call me American, but I want to live in a world where none of that matters. As an individual, I do not care what color, background, sexuality or religion you may be. I love people and always give them the benefit of the doubt. I wish this were the way of the world.

It is 2,008, and gay rights are at the forefront of this election – and things are moving in favor of someone’s right to choose the most basic thing in their lives -- their life partner. However, we know that this far from being resolved. The legality of choosing our partners looms like the blinded woman with the scales of justice. Is she blindfolded to all things but justice, as she should be? Or is she just blind as we hurt one another due to prejudice?

Prejudice and Judgment – why do I care what you think of me? Well, to be honest, rejection is palpable. Like all human beings, the risk and the reality of rejection is that the pain it causes often translates to self-abuse through food, drugs, alcohol, sexual addiction, and low self-esteem. Being gay had a profound impact on my body image and self-worth. I was told I was sick. I was told there was something “wrong with me. What Eckhardt Tolle calls the pain body has, in some ways, taken a lifetime to heal.

There is something “wrong with you.” That’s what our society and even the people closest to us tell us every day. You are gay. You are black. You are fat. You are handicapped. You are wrong. Endlessly, the message is profoundly simple: You are wrong.

And in that wrongness, we kill one another from the moment we first draw breath.

How do we heal this?

· As a nation, we heal it through laws and civil rights.
· As communities we heal it by demonstrating and supporting one another.
· But as a person, the question is always right in front of me. How do I heal the “pain body” and the harm that “being wrong” did to my body and my soul?

Powerfully, thankfully, through hard work, going within, and peeling away the “pain bodies” one layer at a time, I have translated most of my “pain body” into power. So much Power that I get to share it and teach it. Some days I feel like the statue of liberty. Bring me your huddled masses because liberty and freedom are yours. You are not wrong, and you never have to hurt yourself or hate yourself for who you are again. You can be free, not only to be who you are, but to love who you are and anyone else you choose to love.

Where do you begin?

I’ve literally written a book on this. Let me offer one simple tool that costs nothing but a little practice. Stop telling yourself you are wrong, you are ugly, or you are fat. Quite simply, stop the negative self-talk. Every time your mind says what a piece of crap you are for X, Y, or Z reason, stop it in its tracks and say, “I am [your name] and I am wonderful.” Then list the things about you – your core. Such as, “I am a powerful, smart, resourceful, strong, black woman. I can change anything that I want to. I come from a culture of survivors.”

Continue until you cannot say any more.

For years I hated myself for being gay. It was one more reason to shame Laura. Although I live in a world that often feels it is still wrong, I can stand and proudly say, “I am Laura Fenamore, and I am a passionate gay woman. I use my power and deep belief in love to serve others and to claim my right to exist. I am a beautiful woman in a beautiful body. I love myself, and in that, I am empowered to love all people.”

THIS is a good beginning.

To your authenticity,
Laura Fenamore, CPCC, Body Image Mastery Mentor
www.LauraFenamore.com
Laura@LauraFenamore.com

Fate and Fitness – Three Ideas to Change Your Life

What is it that creates our life span? Is it the three Fates, as the Ancient Greeks believed? One who starts the thread of your life, one who guides it, and one who in the end cuts it off? Is it simply the will and whim of a Higher Power? Or do we have far more input in our own longevity than we dare, or care, to admit?

Although there are undoubtedly an endless array of variables that we cannot effect, like being hit by a bus or falling in the bathtub, do we take ownership of those things we can change? Do we use our power and even admit the cause and effect of our choices? When it comes down to it, we can actually choose to live longer, and the trade off is denial. We must admit where we are right now in order to be empowered to do things differently.

A recent issues of Forbes Magazine noted that there are currently 1.6 billion overweight adults in the world. Frighteningly, that number is projected to grow by 40% over the next 10 years. On the list of overweight nations, the United States is number NINE. By contrast, Japan is number 163. When we compare this scale to that of lifespan, it is no surprise that we find it inverted. At birth, a typical Japanese person can expect to live to be eighty-two years old. They are third on the list. Where do we fall, as Americans? We are number forty-five. Sadly, if you are born in the United States, with more advantages than anyone else in the world, you can expect to live a full four years less than your Japanese counterparts.

Four years. That may seem inconsequential when you consider that it is the difference between being 78 or 82 when you leave this life, but ask any person faced with terminal cancer what they would not give for four more years? There’s no guarantees for any of us, but let’s face it, what matters more, quality or quantity – and why not have both.

So what can you DO?

1. Choose life. Every single day, we are able to make choices to claim those four years, one hour at a time. To begin with we can reverse our personal spot on that obesity scale. Simply refuse to be obese, and then do whatever it takes to make that a reality. There is help everywhere if you are willing to look for it. For a nation that grows fatter every year and spends more on weight-loss than the entire nation of Haiti spends on food, this may seem impossible. But this is not a theory or a runaway train – this is YOU. It is your life span and your BMI (Body Mass Index). You are not a number, you are a person – and as a person, you are gifted with free will. Every single thing you do matters. Start with small changes and get onto a roll. Remember, each day that you choose to do the right thing, you win one more day at the end of the track.

2. Build a life worth living. In addition to making better choices, fall in love with your own life. Begin to build a life so great that you want to be here to live it. That may mean you have to make some changes now. Some days it will feel like you’ve gone ten rounds in the ring with Mohammad Ali, but you cannot give up. There isn’t another body to crawl into when you’re finished with this one. Treating this body with self-love and gratitude is non-negotiable if you’re going to earn those extra days. And you’ll need them, a life worth living is one you won’t want to miss for a moment.

3. Fall in love with YOU. You are unique, in all of space and time there cannot be another you. Get to know your own deepest dreams and wishes, and honor them. Even if you cannot create them, you can love the dream itself. And who knows, if you make the right choices enough of the time, and you earn those extra four years, who knows what you might be able to accomplish? Pablo Picasso was 91 years old when he died. So paint the town red and strive to live inside your body and be around to love YOU as long as possible!

To your health, Laura Fenamore, Body Image Mastery Mentor
www.LauraFenamore.com
Laura@LauraFenamore.com